D&D Cliches

So, for your amusement, here is the grand list of cliches and
absurdities that occur (and occur, and occur...) in traditional
RPGs.........
--Avenging Wallflower. These players play characters with a vast
amount of unheralded, unseen power and go out of their way to be meek
and unassuming, at least until a dramatic confrontation occurs in
their vicinity. Whenever active, outgoing characters do something
interesting near them, they will feel an unholy compulsion to leap
into action, screaming and blowing things up with their incredible
powers, simply to interfere in the process and thereby feel that
they've done something. It's quite common in Anime, and I've seen
about a thousand 'I'm a dragon ploymorphed into a halfling'.

--Axebeard Law. In fantasy games, all dwarves should have the
words "axe" or "beard" somewhere in their names.

--Dark Lord. Stereotypical villain in most fantasy games and any
other game with a fantastical bent. Dark, scary, and obviously seeks
the complete subjugation of everything. In the earliest games, these
guys rarely had any motive beyond "well, he's evil - you need more?"

--Deck Of Many Things Law. In Dungeons & Dragons games, players will
always screw around with a Deck Of Many Things if they find one.

--Facial Hair Law. The style and amount of facial hair on any
character will indicate alignment and general tendencies: goatees are
either evil or poseurs, full beards are lovable big guys, long beards
indicate wisdom, and scraggly, unkempt beards mean insanity

--Grudge Monster. Non-planned monster/adversary a gamemaster secretly
puts into the adventure after the players piss him off.

--Heroic Fortitude Law. When wars occur in fantasy games, the heroic
side typically loses almost every battle, but will somehow win the
war.

--Herzog's Law. Given a choice between gaming and dating, many gamers
would be surprised that they actually have a choice

--Illiteracy Law. RPG books always have far more typos than any other
type of publication known to man....

--Intervention Of Reality Rule. D&D-based novels do not in any way
take into account that powerful D&D characters can survive massive
amounts of damage without blinking.

--Monkey's Paw Rule. When players get wishes, the gamemaster will
make every attempt to pervert the wording of the wish into something
harmful (usually by interpreting the wish as literally as possible).
Legendarily true in D&D games

--Mook Law . Any NPC who the players join with and the DM doesn't
bother to name is an NPC that invariably dies.

--Munchkin. Player whose goal in the game is to amass as much power
and kills as possible, whatever the costs to role-playing, the
storyline, fairness, or logic....

--PineSol Law. In fantasy games, all elves should use foliage types
or some reference to the sun in their names.

--Railroading. Any time the gamemaster will not allow players to
deviate from the adventure's one set path or even make their own
decisions.

--Roll-Playing. When character statistics and rolling dice
(especially for combat) become more important than role-playing or
telling a story.

--Saturation Law. At any given point, at least half of all gamers
have plans or dreams of creating and publishing their own RPG.

--Seagalism. When a player attempts to play the same character type
and personality in every game they play. (So named for Steven Seagal,
who plays the same character in every movie.)

--Stoic Moron Law. Unless forced by the game rules and the gamemaster
specifically tells them they're afraid, most players will assume
their characters are fearless and have absolutely no problem doing
things like running through a tunnel full of tarantulas or sticking a
dagger into a towering, screaming monster made of decaying flesh,
twisted metal, and half-consumed victims.

--Tavern Rule. In fantasy games, player characters usually not only
start the campaign in a tavern or inn, but immediately become best
friends

--Trains On Time Rule. Any government overtly or secretly controlled
by an evil force no longer has to worry about bureaucracies, internal
politicking, citizen oversight laws, logistics, or budgets.

--T-Rex On The Plains. A particularly irritating form of Railroading
where the gamemaster uses huge, nasty monsters (or high-level
adversaries) to scare players back onto the path

--Vacuum-Packed Dungeon Law. All high fantasy games contain
underground complexes that no one built, full of monsters that need
no food and never leave their assigned room or corridor.


BT

Some good cliches there, though not all are necessarily bad things...

Bloodtide wrote:--Illiteracy Law. RPG books always have far more typos than any other
type of publication known to man....

WotC is a bit better about this grammar wise, but when it comes to using their own rules... yah...

Bloodtide wrote:--Intervention Of Reality Rule. D&D-based novels do not in any way
take into account that powerful D&D characters can survive massive
amounts of damage without blinking.

While this is an odd paradox, there would be no fun in a book where the fighter could be stabbed 20 times and still feel fine, death builds tension... Although the death of Boromir in LotR actually does reflect DnD, human pincoushin!

Bloodtide wrote:--Monkey's Paw Rule. When players get wishes, the gamemaster will
make every attempt to pervert the wording of the wish into something
harmful (usually by interpreting the wish as literally as possible).
Legendarily true in D&D games

This is usually a good way to deal with munchkins... "I wish for [ungodly unjustified wish]..."

Bloodtide wrote:--Mook Law . Any NPC who the players join with and the DM doesn't
bother to name is an NPC that invariably dies.

yah! ALWAYS give NPC's names, this is a common thing, even made fun of it Order of the Stick!

Bloodtide wrote:--Seagalism. When a player attempts to play the same character type
and personality in every game they play. (So named for Steven Seagal,
who plays the same character in every movie.)

yah, gotta hate this... Only people playing the same character are justified in doing this...

Bloodtide wrote:--Stoic Moron Law. Unless forced by the game rules and the gamemaster
specifically tells them they're afraid, most players will assume
their characters are fearless and have absolutely no problem doing
things like running through a tunnel full of tarantulas or sticking a
dagger into a towering, screaming monster made of decaying flesh,
twisted metal, and half-consumed victims.

most characters become confident in their power, but I also really like the rules of morale in the Miniatures Handbook where your troops are liable to break and run

Bloodtide wrote:--Tavern Rule. In fantasy games, player characters usually not only
start the campaign in a tavern or inn, but immediately become best
friends

I can actually say I don't fit this one... I try to start my players out in front of cities more than not, and I like to have the players not know each other, because it makes for better RP...

Bloodtide wrote:--T-Rex On The Plains. A particularly irritating form of Railroading
where the gamemaster uses huge, nasty monsters (or high-level
adversaries) to scare players back onto the path

This, once in a while, can be useful if the players are completely abandoning hope of survival or rescue if they do what they are thinking of ...

Bloodtide wrote:--Vacuum-Packed Dungeon Law. All high fantasy games contain
underground complexes that no one built, full of monsters that need
no food and never leave their assigned room or corridor.

well, this is more DM error than anything else, some games actually explain the monsters, or use undead/constructs/outsiders/etc, and it is usually easiest to use the dungeons built by a fallen royal family, or built by the kobolds still living in it...